The Greatest American Hero

For months I have held off on writing anything explicitly related to the death of my father. For one thing, no one in their right mind should want to express such deeply emotional experiences to the impersonal void that is the internet. But beyond that, his death affected my views on people and society in such a profound way that I felt like referencing it might come off as, and in fact may be, a cheap way of exploiting his demise in order to bolster the emotional context of my writing rather than appealing to rational argumentation. But in fact, it is that same drive to protect both reason and his memory that motivated me to write this blog.

I became an atheist and left the pulpit it because I came to understand that the material universe in which we live is all that there is. Our existence is not a preamble to something more awesome upon death. This is it - this is our chance to live, our chance to shine. Nothing else is relevant. Some may still cling to escapist fantasies because they are disatisfied with life but that doesn't change the fact the material universe is all that there is, all that ever has been, and all that ever will be. It may change shape and density but no supernatural force guides it.

When my dad, Charles Barrett Porterfield, died he didn't go to wait for me in some mystical dugout while I stepped up to bat - he simply died. The man that didn't get my jokes, the man that thought I was "crazy as hell" at times, the man that loved my mother, the man that sold his Jag so he could feed me and my brother, the man who loved the Braves, the man who was drafted to fight in Vietnam, the man who took me to see a battle royal at a skating rink, the man that thanked me for reaching out to him and looking after my mother didn't go to heaven, he didn't enter paradise, he simply died. If ever a man walking this planet deserved to be considered holy it was the man that put up with my shit growing up. But my father wasn't holy - he was simply an honest, hard-working man who used the same finite capabilities that humans possess to take care of his family. He contributed time and money to charites to help out other poor. He gave 100 mile rides to people with broken down cars. He would trim elderly people's hedges when his body still had the strength to do so. While some individuals claim to be experts on human dignity and compassion because followers call them "His Holiness" my father showed me what compassion was by the way he lived his life. He didn't offer prayers, he didn't read 'scripture' to people, and he never told anyone how to live their lives. My dad was a quiet man whose let the actions of his life teach me this lesson: if I want a better life, if I want a better world then I am the one responsible for making it happen. He was one of those crazy people, like myself, that believed that individuals matter and that the United States of America is the greatest place on Earth.

I'm an atheist liberterian and offer no apologies about this. I do not talk to an imaginary friend for guidance on my life or on how to make the decisions that will most benefit me and the world in which I live. Look at the actions of yourself and those around you and you will see that by and large people are overwhelmingly good. Despite the cries of religious propagandists people don't need to believe in fairy tales to know that murder and rape are wrong and that exhibiting concern for yourself and others is right. It is literally built into our genes and brains. Religious dogma may make you feel bad about fucking your wife while she's on her period but the reality is that most of us are benevolent and it's time that we recognize that. We all take steps to improve things in our lives and few of us go out of our way to harm others around us.

Despite this reality religion thrives on perpetuating myths and ideas that we are broken, mishapen, evil creatures that must defer to something "greater" or at least different than ourselves in order to fix this overstated malady. It has been historically demonstrated - from the god-emperors of Japan to the the Divine Right of European kings to the God of Freedom in the Bush administration - that you can convince large populations to follow you if you but claim supernatural blessings to your cause. You don't need proof or statistics or data - you only need statements of mystic guidance and you can take a position of leadership. And all of it is predicated on lies.

Throughout Barack Obama's campaign I heard him quoting from the Sermon on the Mount, discussing his faith in God, beseeching us to faithfully buy into an illusory thing he called "hope". T-shirts sold at corner gas stations were brazened with his quote, "I'm asking you to believe." During yesterday's Inaugaration how many goddamned prayers were offered by people described as "controversial" because of their ideology and not because they can pretend to speak to magical, fantasy characters while keeping a straight face? Barack is just a man, a famous man who looks great in a bathing suit, true, but still just a man. I'm glad that my niece and nephews, who are themselves African-American, will be able to see a black individual in the news who isn't a preacher, entertainer, or sports star and that this may help break down many of the devisive walls that we separate ourselves with. But believe me, President Obama is no gift from heaven or a prophet of god. He's ambitious, intelligent and talented but he's just a plain old Homo sapien like all of us.

Which brings me back to my father. A lot of people have found a new hero to 'believe' in. I had a hero and he is no longer alive. As sad as that may be, I remain optimistic about my own life and the rest of the world. Nothing is promised to us so we must be grateful for every day and every moment we have in life. The internet (and the birth city of my father and myself) is filled with a lot of smug assholes who think that because they support the politics of a new president rather than an outgoing president that they have demonstrated moral fortitude. My father voted for Reagan and both Bushes. Had he lived he would have voted for McCain. He and I disagreed on many social and political issues but I always maintained my respect for him because, even when he was wrong, he was a man who loved his family, his country, and his friends. I am humbled by his memory for he was the greatest man I have ever known.

And now, Mr. President and supporters, I let you have your celebration. Consider yourselves on notice.;)

A Stupid Book Making a Stupider World

Please don't waste your time reading THE HIDDEN MESSAGES IN WATER by Masaru Emoto. I have a friend that likes to take acid for Jesus who leant me this book. He thinks that I trust science too much and that I am close-minded to the mysteries of the universe. That may be but that doesn't explain how I'm supposed to take statements from HIDDEN MESSAGES like the following seriously:

"Water is not simply H2O. No matter how natural or pure the water you drink, without a pure soul it will not taste good." (p. 83)

"Perhaps it is possible that the miracle water of Lourdes in France, which is said to have healing powers, is filled with the feelings of appreciation of the Mother Mary." (p. 74)

"Love and gratitude are fundamental principles of nature." (p. 134)

Regarding the unfair treatment of the 'research' into homeopathy by Jacques Benveniste: "A year after he submitted his results to the British scientific journal Nature, they were finally published, along with the comment that the results of the experiment were doubtful and without physical proof." (p. xx)
'Without physical proof'?! What good is fucking science if you don't actually have data to back up your conclusion?

If you want to read about the nonsense that is homeopathy check out: http://www.quackwatch.org/01QuackeryRelatedTopics/homeo.html
http://skepdic.com/homeo.html

If you want to follow Emoto's advice, however:
"Whenever you sit in front of water and send out messages of love and gratitude, somewhere in the world, someone is being filled with love and gratitude. You don't need to go anywhere." (p. 99)

Is it any wonder that this book also has information on how to buy shit from Masaru Emoto's water company?

****Originally posted October 30, 2008****

Parking Lots Replace the Salon for Social Discourse

I ran into one of my old Relgious Studies professors in the Home Depot parking lot and he told me that because of my libertarian attitudes that I am actually accelerating the Marxist Revolution. I like this because this means whenever I'm backed into a corner in an argument I can just say that I'm doing it for the proletariat.

And am I the only one that thinks it's funny that a professor still believes in God and Marxism? He might as well add 8-Track supremacy and the War on Terror to his list of great ideas.

****Originally posted September 26, 2008****

What Would Jack Chick Do?

If you or someone you love has been affected by child abuse consult an organization like The Child Molestation Research & Prevention Institute for help:
http://www.childmolestationprevention.org/pages/hero.html

And for the sake of satire check out this link to find out why Jack Chick is a misguided pervert speaking on behalf of a senseless, horrific religion:
http://www.disinfo.com/content/story.php?title=Darkest-Jack-Chick-Tract-Ever

If you have a real life problem, please seek a real life solution. Supernatural or mystical powers do not address physical and mental disorders. Blessings do not remove the pain of emotional scarring. Seeking help from a professional, learning to reclaim your own life and taking responsibilites for your own actions will take you far closer to health and joy than prayer ever will.

****Originally posted June 24, 2008****

See that dead horse? Would you mind taking this club to it for me?

Before my blog I would like to point out that there are blog categories for ’Dreams and the Supernatural’ AND ’Religion and Philosophy’ but nothing for ’Science.’ When will I learn?

Cliched, unnecessary The Godfather Part III quote:
"Just when I thought I was out they pull me back in."

We were having a delightful conversation about the how science and technology has and will continue to impact human development when this question came up - [Chuck], when is your birthday? - automatic red flag. If anyone other than a liquor retailer asks this it usually only means one thing: Astrology. We’re discussing the future of humanity and out of nowhere astronomy’s irrational, self-proclaimed cousin cuts into our dance. And believe it or not, I just kept my mouth shut.

You see, I’ve been on a positivity kick the last couple of weeks and I’m trying not to get so riled up about trivial things. I’ve been trying to squelch my hostility towards relgion and my general malaise towards superstition. Clearly that stuff isn’t for me. For the most part I don’t think that believing in this stuff helps out the world but that, it seems, is irrelevant. I can rant about this stuff until I’m blue in the face but let’s be realistic here - monotheism is not going to be crushed under my foot, mediums will continue to rip off grieving families and people are still going to pray for peace while at the same time re-electing ’born again’ war mongers. I can say my piece, but when it is all said an done my skepticism will be maligned as ’close-mindedness.’ I thought was making up for some of the damage I may have caused while evangelizing Christianity but now I kind of feel like I’m just doing the same thing for another team.

For example, I’d just rather discuss how beautiful the theory of evolution actually is than lambast creationists for their utter disregard for science. None of us have all of this thing called life figured out so I decided to just take the ’what’s right for me may not be right for you’ approach. Maybe this comes from living in the US but this stuff gets shoved in your face whether want it to or not. Take my recent, non-confronational encounter for instance. To the best of my memory here’s how the exchange went:

Companion: "Chuck’s a pretty rational guy."

Inquistors: "What day were you born?"

Me: (as I look to [Companion] to see if she knows where this is going) "December 22nd."

Inquistors: "So that makes you. . ."

-I remain silent-

Companion: "Chuck doesn’t believe in astrology."

Inquistors: "That’s okay. Astrology believes in you."

Did you see that? It jumps from rational to astrological in one freaking question. They may have been kidding about the ’believes in you’ part but I didn’t even ask. In fact, I didn’t even say anything and I still get roped into a conversation about the supernatural.

For those wondering December 22nd means that I was born on the first day of Capricorn, on the cusp with Sagitarrius whatever that means. Supposedly Capricorns are smart, down-to-earth, and stubborn. At times I may be all of those. At others none of those correctly describe me. So what is it? Do the stars only affect who I am sometimes or only when it suits astrologists? And why does it seem that celestial bodies tend to provide positive or useful traits and grant us opportunities to succeed rather than suffer? What about those crossed stars that lead a man to abuse his wife and children? Is Mars’ approach causing him supernatural rage? Frankly, I personally find the suggestion that ’the heavens’ care for some people more than others as ludicrous and distasteful as a god that simultaneously claims to be all-loving and a proponent of war, slavery, and suffering.

Presumably astrology must affect every single organic creature that has ever lived but I’ve never heard of a snail astrologer. Or fern or protozoan for that matter. Presumably it took humans that claim inherint insight into the mystical to discover it. For the remainder of human existence scientists will be working on learning about the breadth and scope of our cosmos and will most likely never fully learn about even the largest bodies in our universe but astrologers have got it all figured out. Never mind the fact that as astronomical information has grown and changed astrology has had to augment it’s supposed workings to adjust to these findings. Science has the good grace to admit that it is a human endevour and open to correction. That, by the way, is one of my problems with most religious thought: it won’t admit that humans are involved in it’s inception. Science is different because it looks toward existing data and postulates answers and then has the audacity to actually test them to see if they make sense. Sometimes they do and sometimes they don’t but at least they aim for consistency. Astrology is so vague that consistency is elusive.

The point is that I, Chuck Porterfield, after a few years of arm chair research and reading a number of books on magic and astrology (not to mention a degree in Religious Studies but who’s counting?) determined that this stuff has no value for me. Fine. Maybe it does for you, but not this guy here. And I’m not going to tell you to give up on it. Hell, maybe I’m missing the forest for the trees and using these glaring inconsistencies to blind my third eye or something. The truth is, I kind of find this sort of silly and childish and I’d rather just move past it. There are real world problems out their that require real world solutions and excuse me if I’d rather hear what the prospects of the future are rather than the unfilled promises of the past. My life has never moved in a more positive, productive direction and I think I’ll do what I can to stay on this course.

Thanks.


****Originally posted March 21, 2008****

Keep your fucking knife away from my genitals. Thanks.

I tried to think of something funny to say but the seriousness of this topic allows little space for comedy. Check this article out entitled "Man Faces Child Abuse Charges After Home Circumcision": http://www.wxii12.com/news/15251643/detail.html

There should be no debate as to whether this man's alleged actions are child abuse but we as civilized humans need to further understand this: ALL circumcision is child abuse. No child for any reason should have harm inflicted upon his penis or her clitoris. Science has found no medically positive reason for cutting or removing a male's foreskin. Don't give me any bullshit about it being cleaner: teach your child to wash his penis and you can give up millenniums of archaic, torturous practices. Lives are only harmed by this practice. It teaches that physical suffering is better to experience than sexuality. America and the world will not be able to healthily and justly deal with issues like sexual abuse as long as genital mutilation is thought of as safe and normal.
If your traditional religious dogma has required circumcisions of infants or children I challenge you to take a stand against the thousands of years of physical and psychological torture that those before you have accepted. You are in a position to be a positive force of change and to unbind some of your religion's primitive chains.
If you are a parent who has had your child circumcised it is never to late to apologize to them, especially if you were unaware that what you were doing was harmful. My physical scarring may never pass but one of the first steps towards my psychological healing was educating and forgiving my parents for doing what society had taught them was normal. Tell your kid that you are sorry and that you will never do it to anyone else. I have to believe that if we work together as a people that we can permanently end the practice of circumcision altogether by the 22nd century.

****Originally posted February 8, 2008****

Would Someone Explain to MySpace what ’Demographics’ Are

I'm sure by now, oh MySpace users, that you've noticed that this dear site analyzes your various entries searching for keywords for marketing purposes. For instance, if you have entered 'superheroes' in one of your interest fields (as I have in the past) you will get adds for comic book sellers on your MySpace homepage. Thanks to our good friends at News Corp. and their directed advertising practices if you select 'Atheist' as your 'Religion,' you can expect ads from companies that offer 'God's Promise in His Word' and debate 'Evolution vs. Creation.' Atheist, people. I do not believe in God. Get it? I used to, now I don't. Pretty simple. Perhaps Christian webmasters have never actually met an atheist, but most of us don't want to subscribe to your daily devotional newsletter. Unless we can win an XBOX360.

++UPDATE++
I now have 'Sponsored Links' that ask if I am 'Struggling with Lust,' 'Believe in Evolution?' and am 'Puzzled by Christianity.' Is this Christianity saying 'fuck you,'? Well, grow up, Christianity. We're getting tired of your nonsense. You're like a child who wants to keep telling us the details of an unfunny joke.

++And now 'Cool Jesus Christ T Shirt.' Really? Nothing makes a fashion statement like '100% Human 100% Divine Color Black, Long Sleeve'

+++This shit is ridiculous: "Want to Share Your Faith?", "Puzzled by Christianity", etc. It has actually gotten so bad, in my opinion, that I have written MySpace to complain. And I guess I will have to again

****Originally posted October 3, 2006****